Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Billboards I like to argue with 3

As Promised
Billboards I like to argue with 3

Nothing is worse that political ads. TV, radio, but this is clearly the worst thing I have ever seen. First of all lets talk a little about capitalization. I think we all agree that if you want to YELL while typing all you have to DO is write in ALL CAPS. So let read this again, this time with the yelling in place, which is clearly what that child is doing. Sometimes it is acceptable to write whole lines in all caps, but then you have to stick to your guns. You can’t not capitalize Is and the CAPS it up on “THAT EQUAL PROTECTION OF THE LAW”. While we are on the topic of EXCLAMATION, in 5th grade my teacher told me that if you use exclamation points unnecessarily that your story (or billboard) will read like a Japanese comic book. Well maybe that is what they are going for with this color scheme, so lets move on to sentence structure NOW!

It is hard to get what the author is going for, just by the subtle overtones. However, I’m pretty sure they meant to say “Is that (in) a child’s best interest”. As it is written it sounes like the 4 days with his dad is the thing that he is interested in that is the best for him, or maybe the favorite of all of his interests. Moving right along, I think they want to say “Is that equal protection of (the) law?”. Unless, of course, they are talking about Jude Law… or maybe LAW is an acronym. That must be why it is capitalized.

My informed wife informs me that a colon can be used to start a list of items, address an individual, or to identify a character in a script. So this billboard either wants Judge Blockman to reform family court NOW, or this is a line from a script in which Judge Blockman is a character. I like to think it is the later. I am also not ruling out that this is just the start of his to do list (it is a work in progress).

Maybe I am being too critical. The red, yellow, and blue scheme is almost patriotic.
Let’s take a step back and look at the billboard as a whole. The child is clearly very upset. I assume he has been reading this billboard, or maybe he wrote the billboard. That actually makes a lot more sense. This really seams like something a 5 year old wrote. The Capitalization, the grammar, the punctuation, this all seems very much like this child wrote and designed this billboard. It is actually pretty impressive.

So I guess I am torn. This billboard makes me very angry and I want to punish its creators, by doing the opposite of what they are asking me to do, but I am not really sure what that is. Is this a pro or anti Judge Blockman billboard. Are they torturing children? I really have no idea. The more I read this the more confused I am. Perhaps I will have to go to the website to find out what the hell is going on… And perhaps that was their plan the whole time. Well played Judge Blockman

3 comments:

gutzville said...

The red yellow and blue color scheme are primary colors...obviously chosen by a child. Speaking of said child...that child looks suspiciously like a young John Gutzmer...perhaps this blog is a secret homage to your young handiwork...

Jonathan said...

Clearly, the child is upset about the 4 worst days of the month that he has to spend in his dad's cockroach-infested apartment in the ghetto.

Ragfield said...

That kid looks a lot like Nigel from "Top Secret".